| dding day is drawing near. The invitations have | | | | wedding day and many days afterwards. Rule |
| been sent, the cake ordered, the rings purchased, | | | | Number Three: Start with a Special Endearment If |
| the ceremony, reception and honeymoon have | | | | you have a special name for your fiancee, use it. |
| been planned. The bachelor party and wedding | | | | Write a personal greeting, like - My most beautiful |
| rehearsal are scheduled. What else is on the | | | | ______________ (your bride's name) - Dear |
| groom's "to do" list? What about the days | | | | wonder of my life - You're the best thing that |
| following the wedding? After all of the investment | | | | happened to me Rule Number Four: Make it |
| in the wedding day, will the new husband and his | | | | Specific and Meaningful With a little practice, |
| bride weather the 50-50 chance of having a | | | | writing a personal love letter becomes a great |
| lasting and thriving marriage? According to top | | | | habit! Make sure that the words you write |
| psychologist Dr. John M. Gottmann, men are often | | | | express things that are specific and meaningful to |
| emotionally deficient when it comes to expressing | | | | your upcoming wedding, yourself and your bride. |
| fondness and admiration to their spouses. Well, | | | | For example, you may write a personal love |
| now may be an excellent time for grooms-to-be | | | | letter that includes how you felt when you first |
| to intelligently plan the emotional success of their | | | | met, what events in your engagement have |
| upcoming wedding. Love letters. Are you and your | | | | meant a lot to you, things that you admire and |
| fiancee exchanging them during your | | | | appreciate about your fiancee, special thanks for |
| engagement? Personal love letters are one of the | | | | favors done, or for any reason that you can find. |
| most revered ways that husbands and wives | | | | (Remember, the more reasons, the more letters!) |
| communicate. Drafting and writing a personal love | | | | Rule Number Five: End with Love Don't just write, |
| letter takes energy, thought and time. As a | | | | "well, that's about it." Get creatively romantic. Use |
| matter of fact, the success of marriage | | | | something that sums up your feelings and lets |
| preparation programs depends upon how willingly | | | | your bride-to-be know that you continue to love |
| a couple shares their feelings, affectionate and | | | | her. Use endings like: Forever Yours, All my love, |
| otherwise, with each other. Dr. Gottman's book, | | | | With love forever, I am so happy you are in my |
| The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work, | | | | life, You mean the world to me. Then, sign your |
| builds on the concept of making regular deposits in | | | | name. Rule Number Six: Make It Pretty A |
| a bride's emotional bank account. One of the | | | | bride-to-be loves getting a special gift and the |
| exercises for building fondness and admiration is | | | | packaging is often as important as what is inside. |
| thinking of and writing down one's positive feelings | | | | In other words, don't write your personal love |
| for the other person. Writing a personal love | | | | letter on the back of a paper bag. Make it pretty. |
| letter to your bride for your wedding day is a gift | | | | Use special stationery (you can visit a scrapbook |
| that will be treasured for years. Here are eight | | | | store and buy just one sheet for less than 50 |
| rules to follow. Rule Number One: Make the Letter | | | | cents.) Or write your letter in a romantic greeting |
| Positively Personal Anything put into writing can be | | | | card. Use your own handwriting, too. A card |
| read, saved and reread. The first rule for a | | | | typed on a computer seems artificial and |
| personal love letter is to make it personal and | | | | mechanicals. Decorate your letter with a personal |
| positive. Love letters carry a message of worth | | | | drawing like hearts or XOXO (shorthand for hugs |
| from a groom-to-be and new husband that | | | | and kisses), or use stickers. Use her favorite color |
| affirms and cherishes his bride. So, it is critical to | | | | envelope. Rule Number Seven: Special Delivery |
| make a list of the positive things about bride wife | | | | Make sure your personal love letter gets your |
| that you want to assert. Avoid any critical, | | | | fiancee's attention. Use surprise. Mail your letter in |
| ambivalent remarks. Let them go and focus on | | | | a special envelope, like Priority Mail or through |
| what you cherish about your new bride. Rule | | | | Special Delivery. Put the letter on the front seat |
| Number Two: It's About Her A personal love | | | | of her car, on her dinner plate or tie a balloon to it |
| letter is a direct communication to and with your | | | | when you pick her up for a date. Rule Number |
| fiancee. Use the word "you" early and often. | | | | Eight: Turn Your Wedding Letter into a New Habit |
| Share your feelings. My parents have been | | | | Trust and ongoing commitment rank high with |
| married for more than 55 years. On my mom's | | | | every woman. Write another personal love letter |
| 80th birthday, our family gave personal | | | | when you go out of town or mail one to arrive |
| testimonies that we taped and made into a DVD. | | | | on Monday after a long day at work. Your |
| My dad stood up and used the song, "You Mean | | | | engagement and marriage will grow with love |
| All the World to Me." He choked up with emotion | | | | beyond your imagination as you regularly write a |
| in front of us all and it was so powerful to | | | | personal love letter to your fiancee. With a little |
| witness the love he had for his wife. As a | | | | consistent effort, grooms-to-be can write |
| groom-to-be, you don't have to wait 55 years to | | | | personal love letters that create a hope-filled |
| make that happen. (My dad didn't!) Start now. | | | | atmosphere, and enjoy a thriving and happy |
| Make your bride-to-be feel special on your | | | | marriage that goes well past the wedding day. |